My tendency is to throw away past experiences that don't match my current experience. (Actually I think this is a human tendency so I guess that proves it.) So when I have any difficulty, there's a part of me that says, "Oh, all that peace I was feeling before was a lie, and this is reality." But reality consists of both light and shadow, peace and struggle, sunshine and rain. They are both valid and have their place and purpose in life. I may see my past experiences differently in the light of today, but that's just part of presence - allowing my experiences to transform me.
Until I learn this truth completely, I write to remind myself: the miraculous feeling of peace that I had been feeling before the current crisis broke is real and valid. Both situations are gift-givers and teachers. They just come bearing different gifts and teaching different lessons. Or is the lesson the same - "trust in God"? It's a good thing God is eternally patient with us, giving us the rest of our lives to learn that lesson.
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